Vampirella: An introduction
by Vampirella
Summary: This is the start of my Vampi posting. I have won awards for my Vampi plotlines.


This story will the first of many I will write and post starring the original cast of the Vampirella comics. We will not speak of what I think of what Harris comics has done to my childhood heroine. I am not a brilliant technical writer, please forgive mistakes in tense, or spelling errors and try to enjoy the stories. Feed back would rock, so please, if you read it say something. Thanks.  
  
Title:Introduction  
  
The black car came to a skidding stop in front of the downtown office building. Other cars had lost control in the porche's wake, their drivers cursing and waving fists thru open windows. Neither of the offending vehichle's occupants seemed to notice or care.  
  
The driver of the car was an elderly gentleman. He was dressed oddly, or at least oddly for downtown Manhatten. He wore a faded, ancient tuxedo, with a white carnation in the lapel. His white gloves were stained with splashes of brown, most likely bourbon or some other form of libation. He was perfectly sober at the moment, tho, as his one passenger did not approve of his drinking and would never have allowed him to drive after indulging.  
  
The raven haired woman sitting next to him pulled down her visor and popped up the 'vanity' mirror. She checked her make-up to be certain that it was perfect. She finger combed her long locks and adjusted her bangs. She smiled into the mirror, and wiped a touch of scarlett lipstick off of her glistening fangs.  
  
"My dear girl," Pendragon said to her, "you know you look lovely as always. And does it really matter, with the little display that you have planned, what you look like?"  
  
"A girl always wants to look her best, Pendy," Vampirella sighed. "Besides, these hacks should see what I really look like. Have you seen the most recent stuff they have published? They gave me GREEN eyes, for Circe's sake!"  
  
"Hmph," the old magician muttered. "They simply decided to pretend I never existed. And the treatment the poor Van Helsing's have suffered at the hands of their scribes. Both dead, and only after such horribly rude occurences."  
  
"Well, that's why we're here," Vampi replied. "I am going to have a little talk with them. I promise to be as polite as I can."  
  
She went about adjusting the straps of her costume, the red fabric that barely covered her athletic yet sumptous body. Deciding all was covered and unlikey to pop out at an inoppurtune time, she reached for the door catch.  
  
"Wait here, and keep the motor running."  
  
As she climbed from the car, Pendragon could not help but take a peek at her departing rear end. He looked away for a moment, and then gave in to tempation and watched as his young friend stalked toward the entrance of the office building.   
  
"To think," Pen said, "as little covering as that costume of hers provides, they have let thier artists make it smaller and smaller as time has progressed. It's absolutely indecent I tell you."  
  
A car behind the porche attempted to pull out it's space, finding itself stuck in place due to Pen's poor parking. It's driver began to honk and holler, and Pendragon glanced in his rear view mirror to assess the situation.  
  
With a deep breath and a sigh Pendragon muttered his favorite magic words.   
  
"bippity-bobbity-bite-me"  
  
With that, the car trapped behind him began to float up and out over the other traffic. The astonished driver of the now floating car was panicking and leaning out of his window screaming for help. As the car floated away down the street, Pendragon waved his handkerchief sweetly.  
  
After a considerable amount of time, the passenger door opened and Vampirella flung herself back into her seat. She slammed the door and cursed under her breath as she reached for her seat belt.  
  
"Drive, dearest," she said thru clenched teeth, "just drive."  
  
Without looking to see if it was clear, Pendragon stomped the gas and flung the little car back into traffic. He waved out the window at the cars swerving every which way to avoid them and turned his alien friend.  
  
"So, were they at all interested in hearing your complaints?"  
  
"No more than they have been interested in the complaints of my original readers thru the years," Vampirella answered. "It seems that 'bad-girl' comics with anatomically improbable characters in tiny costumes doing high kicks sell like crazy. So who the hell cares about plot, or character, or freaking history! All they have to do is hire an artist who has a playboy to use for reference matieral and their job is done."  
  
"But our old run gave the audience plenty of your, um...well, it always made certain to show your assets, if you know what I mean," Pen mused. "Yet, we still had grand romps and adventures. Facing down evil aliens, battling the dreaded Companions of Chaos, even the true vampire affectionado could look forward to regular appearences of Dracula himself. Surely a comprimise could be reached."  
  
"All those people are interested in is seeing how many different covers they can put on the same book and still have teenage boys buy them," Vampi replied. "I am going to find a way to tell people of our adventures, Pen. I mean it. There have to be people out there who want to read about how you, Adam, Conrad and I deal with the monsters in this world, Pen. People who are not obsessed with the cup size of whatever poor girl they have glued into some cheap knock-off of my outfit."  
  
"Glue?" Pen asked, staring at Vampi's bussom.  
  
"No, I do not use glue!" she shouted.  
  
"Then how...I mean, I HAVE always wondered..."  
  
"It's an alien fabric, Pendragon," Vampi said angrily, "and keep your eyes on the road."  
  
Pendragon grinned and turned his attention back to his driving. Well, for the most part anyway.  
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Look for the adventures of classic Vampi characters to be posted here soon. I am in no way employed by, or connected to, Warren comics or Harris comics the owners of these characters. These stories will be purely for the enjoyment of me, and people who love Vampirella. Love to all, Ella 


End file.
